Pickney Experiences

Hello Mam! Can I get $20 to go home please said the cold quivery child, a popular verse learnt at the age of 9, never saw the importance of going to school with a pen life was just fast only thing on my mind was to beg in order to survive….I missed her gone for too long wonder what lock up feels like. No care in the world didn’t have the time to look nice, just wanted to learn how to become street wise.

Looking back dad was blind sighted by me being black, acceptance couldn’t be a fact,
memories like these make you realize no one had your back. At a early stage sister got a call asking how long will it take for us to pack grandma is stressed and we are the cause of this impact. Our wonderful Aunt hung up leaving us in shock.

Life is a journey don’t forget that laugh or cry about your memories….It helps to go back and remember how much you lacked and measure on a scale what you have.

Life got better, no lie mom flea from country. We were next in line I felt appreciated and happiness was flowing through the pipe line but I saw sadness in my mothers eyes…. My sister and I got treated fairly well until one day I saw mom on the floor with the worst possible tantrum I doubt see could bear. The same person treating us well made my mother cry, to this day that memory travels through my mind.

I started to wonder all this isn’t mine, mommy  is just a helper and to others I was just the helpers child. With all said it felt like we were family just that was just a illusion in my mind….chuckling one day I remember the other kids in the house giving us a hard time until one day the lady of the house sat with us and said stop picking on them you may regret it because one day you may find yourself seeking a job in their own firm.
Life is a journey don’t forget that laugh or cry about your memories….It helps to go back and remember how much you lacked and measure on a scale what you have. Youth was a struggle did not like bras they were uncomfortable, saggy pants and sneakers I preferred, girl company never enjoyed, boys understood me and were on my level, realizing now since I didn’t put emphasis on looking nice I was easily accepted as one of the guys. Scaling fence, sculling school, begging, getting in trouble and caring less was where my strength rest.

When searching for your talent as a youth it can be a hard experience to go through, I sang, danced, signed as well but never found the right one that I could do well. Until one day after Miss Lee said your going to get a gold in high jump. I was puzzled because at that time I my shoulders hung low, my head was never upward looking out, I was just a mime seeking a way out so how can a coach see champion in me.

I had to be from house to house when our grandma had bid us farewell all was temporary unit God gave me a father until up to this day I wonder how could a stranger love me more than my biological father.

How many times have I said it. Life is a journey don’t forget that laugh or cry about your memories….It helps to go back and remember how much you lacked and measure on a scale what you have.

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