The Relationship Scammer

It’s unnerving how today’s dating terrain has been overrun by the requirement of financial advantage.

People are getting “stick up” by love and mouth, and robbed by affection before their very eyes. Sometimes they feel powerless to do anything about it, as if they are in too deep to get out or they have invested too much already to walk away and suffer a loss.

A young girl at the Nail Technician Salon cried, her small round shoulders trembled, eyes wild with fury at how a man she was recently in a relationship with asked her to borrow a loan so that he could buy four new tyres put on his vehicle. The girl discovered that he was not repaying the loan and her photograph was splashed on the entrance door of the financial establishment. She was mortified, she couldn’t believe that someone could be that heartless.

people who use people in relationships for money
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But relationship scammers are everywhere and if you are not careful you get drawn into their web of deception and before you know it, they will milk you for all that you have and move on to the next victim. They don’t care about you, they are working on you to get what they want with minimal effort. They lie, scheme and machinate themselves into your life. A little love here and there so you feel appreciated and they collect big benefits and huge rewards. Their love, attention and time is very expensive.


Pauline, a forty year old entrepreneur said “the young boys are always looking her and she stays clear of them, for she don’t want them come nyam down her shop.”

If you are in a union where you are giving your all, supporting this person and getting nothing in return then you are being duped. If you feel stressed, pressured or forced into satisfying the financial demands of another adult who will not or has never done the same for you under similar circumstances then you are definitely being taken for a ride. If everything you do, each gift you buy and money spent on your significant other only lands you in more debt. If you are deluged by unrealistic demands of someone whose intentions are questionable or shady, then you are with a relationship scammer.

I once asked a young man who insisted I purchase a pair of Vikings for his birthday – “What am I getting in return for my benevolence?” He shrugged and explained to me that the choice was mine. I could decide to buy the shoe or not, I also got the impression that either way, it would not improve or make any significant change to our relationship.
I took my money and spent it on myself. I felt much better. I didn’t have an issue buying the shoe, I just did not think he was worth it.

I understood that the choice was mine as is anyone who is in these types of relationships. You can choose to play along with the game or you can opt to walk away. Relationship scammers are often very obvious with their intentions once they become comfortable with you or become secure in your love. They make it known to you that they are opportunists. Some are unabashed about the begging, disrespectful and manipulative : playing on your emotions to get what they want, men and women alike.

Relationship scammers are the lowest types of users. They take you to the cleaners. They always want but never have to give and once you cannot give them, it’s the beginning of the end.

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Crystal Evans

Crystal Evans was born in Westmoreland Jamaica. She is the author of several books centered on her experiences growing up in rural Jamaica and the Jamaican cultural nucleus. She is a voracious reader.

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