Dear Love Doctor

Am I Being Catfished Before My First Date? Help Me Love Doctor

Why not send former Kingston-resident Love Doctor your relationship queries? Use the form to submit your question(s).

Question:

My online girlfriend, who I met on Facebook in May and plan to meet in the flesh soon, appears to be catfishing me.

It went well online until recently when an attractive and curvy lady sent me a Facebook friend request. As her pair of photos were showing plenty of flesh that excited me I accepted because I’m a typical red-blooded Jamaican man. This sexy woman followed up our new online friendship with some racy messages asking me to meet her and enquiring whether I was single.

I can smell a rat when something appears too good to be true, so I responded that I couldn’t meet up as I’m due to meet someone in mid-August. This girl replied but then swiftly deleted her Facebook account.

  

Love Doctor MontiMy online girlfriend, who lives over 100 miles away from me in Lucea, has shown trust issues from day one with me. She has asked if I was going to meet any other girls before we meet up.

I’ve just received another Facebook friend request from an obviously fake lady, who has enormous natural curves and only just joined the social media platform.

I believe that it is my online girlfriend trying to catfish me but why? I’m terrified of asking her if this is her trying to trap me as she may get angry at me for making any accusations and then she may quiz me about these women sending me Facebook friend requests.

I need your advice because I don’t want to turn up for our first date only to be quizzed all night.

Andrew – Ocho Rios

Love Doctor’s Answer

Well done for having the self-discipline to not fall into the trap of being catfished, whether it was connected with this online lady you have been corresponding with since May or someone entirely different.

  

Jamaican men sometimes tend to be disloyal, so you have passed this test of concentrating on one woman at a time with flying colours and hopefully this catfishing will end.

The whole point of you potentially being catfished is that it’s often used to trick people into emotional and/or romantic relationships. In your case if it’s this woman from Lucea then it will be out of sheer curiosity and to establish whether you are a good catch.

My advice is to improve your stance with these Facebook friend requests, you don’t need to massage your ego with fake hot female Facebook friends that you’ve never met and will never meet. Show some empathy, if this woman that you refer to as your online girlfriend was suddenly accepting Facebook friend requests from a clutch of good-looking guys you wouldn’t be particularly happy. So be a gentleman and concentrate solely on her.

In the meantime start preparing some questions and collating some romantic words to throw into your rendezvous. Be aware that those initial seven seconds when you meet will determine whether there is a physical attraction or not. Hopefully sparks will be flying when you two finally meet in mid-August.

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