How Do I Land A Hot Date Via Text?
If you fancy sending your romantic relationship dilemma to former Kingston resident Love Doctor Monti, author of Journey To Find The Perfect Partner Forever, kindly submit your question via our form or send a direct email to [email protected].
Question:
How do I try to initiate a potential romance with a long-time high school friend via SMS?
Pablo, Harare
Love Doctor’s Answer:
Life is too short to let opportunities pass by, so don’t let any awkwardness ruin what could turn out to be a meaningful romantic relationship.
Before you dive head on into sending an SMS, find out whether this potential love interest is single and emotionally available.
Scouring social media channels is your best bet to see if she has a beau, and to check that she hasn’t just ended a romantic relationship so is not quite ready to date.
Should those channels not reveal the relevant information, you could always subtly find out from mutual friends.
When you’ve established that there could be a potential romantic liaison with this lady, you should prepare for the worse. No one likes rejection, but we all have to accept it in life.
Just tread with trepidation, and before firing off any message consider your value to her as boyfriend material. You also don’t want to feel that she is out of league in any category.
RIGHT FIT MATTERS
Many romances are never given a chance to begin because the couple are not ever going to be a good fit, and sadly many men are unrealistic about the lady that they wish to date. Consider whether you could be long-term partners before sending an SMS.
When jobs are advertised they list specific criteria, which is to prevent wasting time for the company and individuals. This is a similar scenario to romantic relationships.
I prompt you to write a list of what you can offer this lady should you manage to land a date. You don’t want to embarrass yourself if there’s little chance of becoming a couple, and make her no longer wish to be friends.
Opposites attract is an overused expression, as partners tend to mirror each other deep down. Having mutual interests is frequently the foundation for building up a romance.
As you are already friends with this lady, then you need to ensure that your similar interests can help bring you together romantically. You should check out my guide to actions and chat-up lines to get out of the friend zone.
Your perfect SMS needs to grab her attention, rather than you acting like an overexcited puppy by bombarding her with messages or sounding desperate.
PLAY TEXT TENNIS
Before you go for the kill by asking her out on a date, I would urge you to gradually give off positive vibes courtesy of cell phone flirting. Keep the messages down to two sentences, so that you are effectively playing text tennis.
Throw her a genuine compliment with the initial sentence, then convey what you want to say with the next sentence. Don’t ask questions where she can answer yes or no, as she will probably find your communication lazy and leave you hanging to hear back from her.
To remain mysterious and interesting it is essential to only put your initial rather than your whole name at the end of each SMS. Just use one lower case x as a kiss until you have experienced a date.
KEEP TEXTS FLOWING
Try to maintain the momentum of messages, so that you reply to her rather than getting stuck into the rut of initiating communication. And prompt responses are recommended, not playing games by waiting for at least an hour to reply as that’s disrespectful.
When you feel courageous enough to ask her out then it’s easy enough to go for the kill.
It’s vital to offer her two options of when to meet at the weekend. Make one choice fun, such as going to the beach, a concert or dancing. A simple rendezvous like the cinema or a drink is a positive possible other option.
By having a choice of two activities, which both offer her an incentive to meet you, means that if she’s remotely interested in you romantically that she will leap at this opportunity to meet you.
SIMPLY THE BEST
Once you have landed your date then you should create the best version of you. Consider investing in a new signature scent or upgrading an accessory such as a piece of jewellery or watch. You are giving yourself some self-love, and will feel more positive about life, by treating yourself.
You should also get ready to do 70% of the listening when you get to see each other face-to-face. It’s no use going full throttle by endlessly talking on your date, even if you are nervous.
You need to use the drip-drip approach so that she wants to keep meeting to find out more about you. I suggest you read my guide to securing a second date to avoid any potential disappointment.
If you have similar aspirations and goals, on top of mutual interests, then you should be able to turn this rendezvous into a long-lasting romance.
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