Twelve Things Jamaican Women wish Jamaican Men Knew
When I collated the article “Ten Things Jamaican Men wish Jamaican women knew“ about Relationships, it was meant to be a satire piece.
Most people missed the sarcasm because they were upset with the suggestions made by these Jamaican men.
It is funny that they should think that list was crappy when it should well explain the reason why we have this many single parent homes with females as head of household. Something is wrong with the way our men see relationships. We complain that the issues we face in Jamaica stem from a breakdown in family life. Families are created from relationships. Maybe if we fixed our relationships,we could fix Jamaica. It is a crappy reality.
Here are Twelve Things Jamaican women wish Jamaican Men Knew about Relationships !
These are the opinions of some Jamaican women and do not reflect the ideologies of all Jamaican women.
They are not facts, the article is not meant to conquer or convert but to inspire discussion so we can come at truth. In doing so we will get the facts out.
1. Jamaican women know that when a man says he wants an independent woman, he does not really mean he wants a woman who can complement his financial position. Some women are of the opinion that these men really want a woman to supplement their lives economically. “Them want smady fe mind them”. Additionally a Jamaican man will take the “independent woman’s” money and “mine” some woman who cannot help him. He will take your car and go out with women who cannot buy gas to put in it. Jamaican women say that they are wising up to this “con” and are only independent for their own subsistence. They have no intention of “minding” any big man.
2. Women like Oral sex, Women know you like it too. You just do not want your friends to know you like it or do it but the women say that is okay, they will keep the secret for you. Women are open to experimenting with you. They are just socialized to see it as indignifying. Moreover do not tell a woman to do it and then refuse to return the favour. Be reciprocal. This aint the ‘Romping Shop’.
3. When a Jamaican woman says she wants to go on a date. She means she would like to at least go to a social setting where you can have a few drinks and talk, get to know each other. A date is not in your bedroom demanding sex. These men nowadays do not want to date anymore, when they call and ask for you to meet with them, they would like to know straight off the bat if “you ago run some”. Some will find some way to postpone the date if they do not hear what they want to.Some women flat out lie and tell them yes. Women say they would like to go on date therefore when a man is ‘looking’ a woman, please prepare for at least one date.
4. If you do not want a baby. Use a condom. Do not ask a woman “how that happen?” when you went horse riding bareback. If you do not want a child with a woman, use protection and insist that she uses hers so that she is clear on where the relatonship stands. A woman can only call your name on the ” Jacket” if you went there without your socks and boots.
5. When a woman is willing to spend her hard earned money on you, it is not because she is a fool. It is because she loves you and wants you to be happy. If she can afford to she will buy her man anything to make his life convenient so that he can be at his best. There is no greater joy than when the one you love is happy and stress free. When a person is happy, they have more fulfilling relationships. Women in Jamaica and within the diaspora complain that if you “assist” some Jamaican men “they take you for a fool”. It is ironic that men do not see themselves as “fools” when they spending thousands of dollars on some chick who sleeps with them every other month.
6. Most women have never had an orgasm. Most men do not have a clue about fulfilling sex. A lot of women stick around because they love the idea of you or what you represent socially or financially and not because of how good you are in the bedroom. Most Jamaican men do not even cuddle, “Slam, Bam, Thank You Madam”. The caveman tactics in bed does not always work and men insist that women find creative ways to maximize pleasure and yet they come as they are, thinking that great sex only requires an erect penis. The gist is that a woman can still feel sexually satisfied without an orgasm. Too many men come into the bedroom with sexual expectations without bringing any prowess to the bed. Dance hall music convinced men that their pleasure was more important than female satisfaction. These men will gladly say a ‘vagina” was not good when in truth they just laid down on them back expecting great sex. Men must move the waistline sometimes too.
7. “Old Fire stick easy fe Ketch” Hmmmmm. In some instances that might be not be entirely accurate. Some men feel that because you had sex with them one time then they can always get it from you whenever they like. Women are saying that when they throw water on the fire stick, no amount a gasoline “can make it light back”. Some men think that because a woman has a child with him he is still entitled to sex. Women are standing their ground. If she broke up with you, she breaks all ties with you.
8. Do not see a woman on the road and harass her. If she is interested she will let you know. A grown man knows when a woman likes him from when she does not. Do not think you can convince her to like you by harassing her with “Pssssst”, insulting her or manhandling her in public. She will hate you with a passion and you ruin any chances you might ever have with her.
9. Men will insist that a woman keeps up her physical appearance and yet he will gain weight, grow his hair and facial hair without any complaints from his partner. Women are saying men should try to keep in shape and maintain a good physique. A woman might not say it but she wants a man with an impeccable body,a good job, money, a good size penis and the whole works. Most Women will settle for a less than ideal partner while some men insist on perfection and think becuase they have money, they can come as they are, beer belly and all.
10. Women want help in the home. It does not emasculate you to assist with the chores. Doing chores together creates an opportunity for bonding and some good reasoning. You are not less of man if you assist with washing the clothes, ironing and cooking. Do not believe what your friends say about you being ” Bwoy a yard”. Women adore men who are willing to help out in the home, spend time with children, assist with homework and watch television with their partner.
11. What men call “nagging” is a woman’s way of showing she cares about you or that she is concerned . She is not trying to upset you, she merely needs reassurance. If she stops “nagging” you: do not think that she got the message, she might have found your replacement. If you do not want her, just put her out onto the streets and you will be surprised at the number of men who would be interested in her. Do not think that because a woman might look “pop down” that another man won’t want her and you can treat her badly. What you are not willing to do, some other man will.
12.We are in a relationship with you and not with your friends or your family members. It is full time men learn how to tell their mothers, sisters and female cousins to respect their partners even if they do not like them. Friends who are still bachelors must learn to respect their male friends who are in a relationship. Please tell your friends to not show up at late hours of the night asking you to go clubbing when they know that you are now a family man. A man has to compromise in a relationship just as he expects a female to make sacrifices. A lot of men will insist that an in-law who they do not like does not come around his house and yet his family visits whenever they want to and are sometimes disrespectful to their partners. A man will demand that his wife does not maintain friendships with women of questionable character and yet he keeps his promiscuous male friends and goes out with them on a regular basis. Women are saying cut the double standard.
Name some other points you think Jamaican men should know about women and relationships!
Quote :“The idea that sex is something a woman gives a man, and she loses something when she does that, which again for me is nonsense. I want us to raise girls differently where boys and girls start to see sexuality as something that they own, rather than something that a boy takes from a girl.”
— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie”
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I am a white woman who lives part of the year in Jamaica, from my experience over the last 8 years I see quite a few Jamaican women treating their sons differently from their daughters,expecting the girls to do chores and pandering to the boys every whim because he is male.If you bring boys up to believe they are to be waited on you make life hard for the women he will meet as an adult,we are all equal wether male or female. In conversation with Jamaican men I have heard them say they are kings and should be treated… Read more »
I loved it well said,men need to know us women better we are not your puppet for you to fling aside and pick back up when you are ready
I loved it well said,men need to know us women better we are not your puppet for you to fling aside and pick back up when you are ready
so we have heard all the bad , wat about the gud ,there are gud men out there too ,but we dont get recognition we deserve , there are those of us who do all that an more ,there women out there who cause men to have most of these behaviors u speak about ,like men who do house chores an women see them as weak ,or the ones who dont like to kiss or be romanced ,because of the same dance-hall music u talk about ,there are times where u bring a girl over an if you should put… Read more »
It is refreshing to read this article, hopefully this will help women get more insight and wise up. I’ve only been in Jamaica for 2yrs, but I have noticed that most of the men treat their women badly n abusively. Its a sight for sore eyes but I’m happy that women are wising up and big up to all the good men that actually play their part.
Good read.
Well said
before these men are our husbands / partners they are women’s sons ?? .Jamaica do a lot of men bashing when all I see where I live is men doing what they should and the woman still not happy and complaining .Personally I think woman in their fight for liberation took the wrong path .To me they have lost the art of being real women and lost the art of loving a man . If men are so bad its because we women have allowed it . I haven’t seen many women here that fit that list above .Men are… Read more »
Some men think they are too smart and that is one of the reasons why some have ended up getting “Jacket”. Full time for men to show respect to their live in lovers and stop playing around with outside women. This is the reason why so many of them get ‘Jacket.
Indeed
I totally agree that female should be respected and treated has a queen. But females have too many mood for a guy to fully understand. Today they love you for one thing then next week you are not doing enough. Guys just want sex but females want the world and everything in it.
Let the church say AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nail on the head
As always, excellent article! Thanks.
good read but to tell you the truth this is vice-vercy
again you are missing the point Crystal, but you are entitled to your opinion,just do some research before you write some a this crap, notice i say some as not all is,its really important to separate the men from the boys.
I do agree with some of your views, but from my experience, what a woman says she wants and what she actually, needs are two different things. Either they are fooled or they just prefer this, but women usually make the worse possible decisions when it comes to choosing men. I am personally of the opinion that a woman prefer the drama of a bad relationship, than the monotony of a relationship with a man who will give her what she really needs, respect, kindness, love, intimacy tenderness….I guess that’s the reason if a man will be a good, considerate,… Read more »
When a man genuinely does his best to ‘improve’ please a woman the more he realises the bar is raised, and it becomes an unattainable task! Thus we give up, and do what we can. Most MEN are not influenced by friends or family, but it must be understood, they were there before I met you so we cannot just get rid of them because you are now in my life, and no I won’t turn away my brother because he turns up one night needing a bed. The man you met and pretended, to love is still the man… Read more »
True
Somehow I feel am not Jamaican…because I never had these views of life, I have been questioned about my nationality both home and abroad because of my views towards life, I love women and I believe men and women can live in harmony….I am not insecure about my sexuality, I for one love oral sex, I enjoy doing the groceries with my girl, I am the cook in the house…she loves my cooking and we do laundry together…a matter of fact we do everything together…so my conclusion to this is that one’s culture mold an shape us as individuals, but… Read more »
Interesting.
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Crystal like most women you have not yet realize that a man didn’t get to choose the size of his penis,if it were so all men would be at least 10 inches.
Otherwise loved the ‘write ‘.
The thing is if you are king, you should want a queen and treat her accordingly!
jamaican men want u 2 support them and their family 2
this is so true
I am a white woman who lives part of the year in Jamaica, from my experience over the last 8 years I see quite a few Jamaican women treating their sons differently from their daughters,expecting the girls to do chores and pandering to the boys every whim because he is male.If you bring boys up to believe they are to be waited on you make life hard for the women he will meet as an adult,we are all equal wether male or female. In conversation with Jamaican men I have heard them say they are kings and should be treated… Read more »
so we have heard all the bad , wat about the gud ,there are gud men out there too ,but we dont get recognition we deserve , there are those of us who do all that an more ,there women out there who cause men to have most of these behaviors u speak about ,like men who do house chores an women see them as weak ,or the ones who dont like to kiss or be romanced ,because of the same dance-hall music u talk about ,there are times where u bring a girl over an if you should put… Read more »
I loved it well said,men need to know us women better we are not your puppet for you to fling aside and pick back up when you are ready
Somehow I feel am not Jamaican…because I never had these views of life, I have been questioned about my nationality both home and abroad because of my views towards life, I love women and I believe men and women can live in harmony….I am not insecure about my sexuality, I for one love oral sex, I enjoy doing the groceries with my girl, I am the cook in the house…she loves my cooking and we do laundry together…a matter of fact we do everything together…so my conclusion to this is that one’s culture mold an shape us as individuals, but… Read more »
I totally agree that female should be respected and treated has a queen. But females have too many mood for a guy to fully understand. Today they love you for one thing then next week you are not doing enough. Guys just want sex but females want the world and everything in it.
It is refreshing to read this article, hopefully this will help women get more insight and wise up. I’ve only been in Jamaica for 2yrs, but I have noticed that most of the men treat their women badly n abusively. Its a sight for sore eyes but I’m happy that women are wising up and big up to all the good men that actually play their part.
Nail on the head
before these men are our husbands / partners they are women’s sons ?? .Jamaica do a lot of men bashing when all I see where I live is men doing what they should and the woman still not happy and complaining .Personally I think woman in their fight for liberation took the wrong path .To me they have lost the art of being real women and lost the art of loving a man . If men are so bad its because we women have allowed it . I haven’t seen many women here that fit that list above .Men are… Read more »
Some men think they are too smart and that is one of the reasons why some have ended up getting “Jacket”. Full time for men to show respect to their live in lovers and stop playing around with outside women. This is the reason why so many of them get ‘Jacket.
I do agree with some of your views, but from my experience, what a woman says she wants and what she actually, needs are two different things. Either they are fooled or they just prefer this, but women usually make the worse possible decisions when it comes to choosing men. I am personally of the opinion that a woman prefer the drama of a bad relationship, than the monotony of a relationship with a man who will give her what she really needs, respect, kindness, love, intimacy tenderness….I guess that’s the reason if a man will be a good, considerate,… Read more »
When a man genuinely does his best to ‘improve’ please a woman the more he realises the bar is raised, and it becomes an unattainable task! Thus we give up, and do what we can. Most MEN are not influenced by friends or family, but it must be understood, they were there before I met you so we cannot just get rid of them because you are now in my life, and no I won’t turn away my brother because he turns up one night needing a bed. The man you met and pretended, to love is still the man… Read more »
True
Good read.
As always, excellent article! Thanks.
Let the church say AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Indeed
Well said
Your analogy of some of the behaviour of many men in Jamaica are correct, especially their misconceptions about satisfying their partner in the bed room, and sharing household choirs… My only reservation is the casual way you dealt with sex between man and woman…i think it was a miss opportunity to put more value on sharing your body with another person! Going out on a few dates, though you talk about one date should never be considered knowing enough about a person to allowed them to bed you, especially a woman or a girl… when that happens you will never… Read more »
my comment is if you know you can find better why complain go out on the road make someone else pick you up as stated cause only man is the bad apple and woman are perfect.
Brilliant ..let then know girl!!!!
you one wonder why I am asking you that is just I won’t to know abut does cool what are you looking for on a men
hi how you doing miss you look berry lovey I want you to till this do you like amrican men
if does same thank you OK with